I've Never Hated Reading So Much...

Today was the kind of sub job I'd been dreading. Was it because...

a) it involved teaching advanced algebra?
b) the children were heinous monsters intent on torturing me?
c) the day involved recess duty?
d) all of the above?

Ha! It was secret option e... a completely unrealistic lesson plan for squirrely twelve year-olds!

Oh yes, here's what I was expected to do with the sixth graders. From 9:30-12:00, they were to read. That's it. Read a book, magazine, etc. Apparently, it was "read-in" day (whatever made-up elementary school boo-hockey that is), and the children were bringing in pillows, blankets, and stuff animals to curl up with all day while reading. Seriously? What twelve year old can spend 2 1/2 hours reading? I'm a bookworm adult and that time length is pushing it. Even better, the afternoon was to be spent either continuing to read, or playing board games. The classroom teacher had one copy of Sorry, several games of chess (yeah right), and a deck of cards.

By 10:15, I was ready to stab several of them. The kids were allowed to snack while "reading" and I 'bout lost my mind. Several of the girls decided to build a fort out of their blankets and desks (they at least then sat under it quietly reading), whereas the boys had more fun climbing into each other's sleeping bags, and hitting each other with the reading pillows. I sent them all outside for mandatory recess twice, and forced a writing assignment on them for the last 45 minutes of the day because my head was throbbing and it was the only thing I could think of to get them into their desks for some of the day. Of course, the one day I didn't bring any extra wordsearches or time-filling worksheets is the day that I could have used them!!

Worst lesson plan to leave for a sub ever. And, honestly, an irritating waste of a day. True, I read an entire young adult fiction book in the morning, but aren't American children falling behind the rest of the world in academics? How is lying around pretending to read a good use of school time? I know for certain the class spent last Friday on an un-educational ice skating field trip, and now another wasted day spent eating Valentine's Day candy and giving their sub a headache. I understand elementary school is different than high school, but still - come on! This shiznit would not fly in my elementary school!

Ugh. I'm going to go drink some more and NOT read anything.